The Start Of My Brand New Life

Well I have no idea where to begin.. It's funny.. I feel like I'm a completly different person. Well I guess I am. I won't try to catch up on what happened before because it all seems almost like a dream anyway.. I don't really even know the girl that used to be. But that's okay.. I like the new one much better. Before I had my share of running around and having a little bit of fun.. But now I have found my true earthly joy.. I have found true love that I will hopefully be able to keep for the rest of my life. I am now married to a wonderful man named Grant Branscum. We live in Cherokee Village, AR. And have a sometimes terrible, most of the time wonderful little dog named Leanna. I work at the North Arkansas Vet Clinic every day of the week except Sunday. Still waitressing some at clydes.. Just Friday and Saturday nights now thank goodness. I stay pretty tired and am still fighting some health issues but life is still pretty amazing from where I sit. I'm sure that time will fly and I'll keep too busy to be able to post much on here this time around but we'll see what might happen. As much as I hate to addmit my faith has taken a back burner here lately. Me and my husband visited John 3:16 this morning and it made me realize how much I miss being that in touch with the faith I once had so strong. But I know that through prayer I can recieve that peace that passes all understanding once again. It's just a matter of working hard enough to make time to do it. As easy as it might sound to some.. getting a few spare min. that you aren't dieing to do something for yourself doesn't come around very often for me. But I know that my life can even be more blessed if I take that time. That is my challenge to myself that hopefully I will be able to achieve soon. Grant and I are still finding some problems to work out as we cont. to get to know each other in a way that only a husband and wife can. But thankfully we have been able to work past them and our love has just grown stronger. I feel quilty but I must admit that most of our disagreements start with me. I feel that it is no excuse but prehaps a reason.. The health problems I struggle with seem to be getting worse and there is know answer. I know have no isurence and unfortunatly I've already had to go to the ER once since Grant and I have started seeing each other. I just finished paying those off. I dread going to the doctor and putting us more in debt. Grant says that soon he hopes to have insurence where he works. If that comes about then prehaps I will be able to go and see if they know what might be the cause of these problems. I get so tired of being sick and my nerves suffer because I have trouble controlling that. Again I know that if I can rediscover that closeness with the Lord that I will have more strenth to deal with these trials as they may come. My boss Dr. Bob swears it has alot, if not all, to do with the way I eat. Which I would not say wouldn't be too far from the possible truth. I don't have a very ballenced diet but I'm afraid that has alot to do with lack of time and motivation. Along with the fact that I believe I was born with unhealthy tastebudds. It seems that almost everything that is supposed to be so good for you I just can't hardly stand to put into my mouth. Seems to cause quite a bit of trouble when one trys to eat healthier. Grant is a pretty good cook although he rarely has the time or energy to do it very often either. Prehaps someday we can slow down a little.. although the rushing of things dose add some excitment sometimes. But mostly we just stay tired. All good things come with a cost though. But it will be worth it when we start too reap what we are sowing. I feel that, that time is not very far off. Things are working out very well... and some people have given or said are sending us money for a wedding present although we said it was not expected. Just another blessing for us. Well it is getting late and I'm afraid I have to get up early for work. Hope all is well with whoever may read this blog.

God Bless,

Heather Branscum

Oh my gosh... I cannot believe that this thing is still running.. or that I remembered my user name and password. lol I spent alot of time and went back and looked at my old post from like forever ago.. I just had to laugh. I can't believe how compleatly insane and pathetic I was. Needless to say I am a compleatly different person today. Thank the Lord! lol I was so stupid.. I've lived such a wonderful life and all I talked about was how horrible it is. Gosh how embarrising. lol Well I know I've tried to start other online journals or continue others and it just hasn't worked out and who knows if this one will either... but we'll give it a shot. lol.. Well I guess I have SOO much catching up to do. lol Might as well get started.

Okay.. I'll skip the small talk and just try to outline the bigger things that have happened. It will take a long time to just list those.. lol Since the last time I wrote I have.. um.. Worked at subway for almost 2 years, and I met my first boyfriend Andy Anderson at school when I went to UACCB. We had english comp. 1 together and we started talking when I accidently almost ran over him in the parking lot one day. I compleatly fell in love with him and we dated for a little over a year. Then on November 8th of this year he broke up with me. He said that his feelings had just changed and he didn't see it going anywhere in the future. Needless to say I was compleatly torn apart. But through God and the support of my family I got over that. Durring Andy and I's relationship I moved out of my parents house to a trailer in Cave City that I rented from a place in Batesville. I loved having the freedom to do whatever I wanted although nother different was really done. lol. But just the thought that I had that control if I wanted it was enough for me. I stayed in the trailer for 6 months and then moved back in with my parents for a little while. I was there durring the time that Andy broke up with me... which I was very thankful for considering the fact that going back to my trailer to sit by myself and get all depressed more than likely wasn't my idea of a good time. Although I still had a really hard time dealing with it even being there with everyone and having their support. I learned alot from Andy though and he was a really good boyfriend. He treated me with compleate respect and did everything to make me happy. Somewhere along the way he just stoped loving me. And it was really hard.. but looking back I see that we might not have been able to make each other compleatly happy because we were very different in ways that caused a lot of problems in our relationship. Anyway.. Katie Jacobs and her boyfriend Grant set me up with Grant's best friend Daniel a couple weeks after Andy and I broke up. We met at Katie's house for a weekend and had a blast! We had a few drinks and really just had a super good time. Daniel and I hit it off really well and started talking on the phone right after we left Katies. We talked just about straight for a few days and then he asked me if I wanted to try a relationship. So we did. But it didn't work out. We broke up today actually. I know.. it compleatly sucked breaking up on Christmas. But we faught all the time and I wasn't happy. We got into it and he said some things that he had no buisness saying to me so I ended it. I really hope that he can get over it and I'm sure he will despite what he was telling me. Because we've only been dating a month and he just took it way to seriously way to fast. Durring this relationship I moved back out of mom's and dad's to an apartment in ash flat after living with katie and grant for a couple weeks. I have had a blast. I'm got to have fun on the weekends with them. We did some partying and playing poker.. really just have a compleatly good time!! I love my new apartment. It is SOO cute! And being in Ash Flat is like being in a compleatly new world. People there know me as me.. not from my rep. at church or who my parents or brother is. They know me for me and how I act and what they see. It's great. Dad is going to pay my way to school so I'm going to try to start back come Jan. I want to be able to get into nursing school and go on to be a R.N. I'm really excited about it but I'm also really nervous because nursing school is very hard and I'm not good in school anyway.. I'm afraid that I won't be able to get through it.. But the only way to find out is to try.. so that's what I'm going to do. :) Things at church have been compleatly different. I've only been once in about a month.. and that was last sunday morning. Well I only went for Sunday school. Jessica Davis, Nathan Marlin, and Nathan Rogers were the only people to say a word to me. Bethany, Holly, Bobbi Lee, and Erica all looked right at me and never said a word. I just can't handle that kind of stuff right now. And Andy is still going there every Sunday and it was really hard having to be around him too. It's just way to much for me to deal with right now so I think I'm actually going to look for someone else.. But as far as the actual church things have been good I suppose. They finished our new building and it is beautiful!  But right now I'm in Hamburg for Christmas and it has been great! Derek and Shelby got to come down again along with everyone else and it has just been wonderful to get to see and spend time with everyone. I figure I will drive back to Ash Flat tomorrow because I think I'm going to have to work Thursday. If I don't until Thursday night I might wait to go back Thursday morning. But I'm not sure yet.

Anyway.. There's a good start. lol. If anyone still reads these things just comment and let me know. Hope all of you are doing well!

-Heather

Currently Listening Songs About Me By Trace Adkins Honky Tonk Badonkadonk see related

HSLIFE :

My homeschool life is hardly there.. the only thing that might could be put under this section is the boys basketball team. It's about the same.. lol.. yeah I know .. *that bad* I'm just kidding guys ;) But yeah.. I pick up my brothers every Monday after ball practis to take them home. I see the guys there but other than that I have no contact with the other homeschoolers at all. James has been here a couple of times over the past couple of weeks to come spend time with Dakota and Garrett. Othere than that.. Nada. Speaking of James.. he just got a job working at the Subway in Cave City.. so I guess I'll see him there if I go eat with Jonas or Eric and Bethany.. or people like that. We eat there alot.. or used to when Bethany worked there.. but anyway.. that will all be said in the Crosswalk section.. hehe.. Anyway.. yeah back to the homeschool stuff.. Clayton and Courtney started going to Batesville this year so I don't have hardly any contact with them anymore.. I saw Clayton at the boy's practis a couple weeks ago.. on Martin Luther King Jr. Day .. whenever that was. But other than that I havn't talked to anyone eles. I never talk to Logan anymore.. For different reason.. we kinda ended our friendship on a bad note the last time I talked to her.. I saw her when I met mom and Jubile (sp?) Last Monday.. but she didn't say anything to me so I remained quiet as well.. It's funny how friendships work.. but that's the world we live in.. And the way I am it doesn't effect me either way.. so it's no big deal on this end. I haven't talked to Kelsie in awhile.. there for a little bit I was talking to her some.. Which doesn't sound like anything to people who don't know the story.. but in short.. Kelsie and I knew each other before she moved.. and we hadn't talked since.. and then I got her e-mail addy from philip I think and we started talking again.. it was like meeting a new friend kinda..** I miss talking to you girl! **, Philip and I have remained friends in spite of some things that have happened over the last months of my homeschool life.. which is a very good thing. I was sure he would leave when I shut the door on our friendship.. but good oll' Philip knew that was just my way of dealing with things.. and when I decided to open the door back up he was there waiting.. thanks Phil. J-man is just as awesome as usual.. lol.. he's going to be wild when he gets older.. but anyway.. yeah.. that's pretty much my homeschool life :) A little longer than I thought it would be but anyway.. on to the next section.

School:
School has deff. changed alot over the last couple of months.. I've started a class at UACCB that I have at 8 on Monday's and Friday's till 9:15. Then on Monday's I also have a private AP english class that I take with been from a lady named Mrs. Tune. I like both my classes... Yesterday.. I either slept compleatly through my alarm or it didn't go off .. or.. well.. regardless of the reason I didn't get up untill mom rushed into my room at 7:45 screaming and I quote "DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS?" And then there was alot more frills and dressings to go with that but the whole point is I missed my class. A thing that did not sit well in the Tuggle household.. or with me.. I was so mad at myself.. I didn't want to miss one so early.. The good news is.. my class is a breaze! I should be able to just pick everything up on Monday. My english class is .. well. let's just say it's a little bit harder than my class at the college. But my teacher is a wonderful person.. And a devoted Christian.. she actually goes around and speaks and different conventions.. AND she writes Bible studies. I found that very impressive! I have two essays.. no wait.. three.. to write before Monday so I'm stressing a little about those.. but it shouldn't be too hard because they're only 14 sentences ones.. however you would say that.. oh well.. yeah.. and that's about all there is to school.. minus some reading thing that I do here.. I will start more classes at the college next sem. But this one class is more than enough right now.

CROSSWALK/SPIRITUAL LIFE:
My youth group is still amazing.. I've just changed alot.. It's not as big of a thing to me as it was.. I mean it's still a major part of my life.. but things have happened.. with me.. and some of my friends.. that I pulled me away from parts of it.. My relationship with God had been on hold for a few weeks.. I'm trying to get that under control. So right now I guess you could say it's "On the mend" As most of you know one of my best friends , Holly Miller, was in a very bad car accident and was in the hospital.. she is now home but has to wear a back brace for about 4-5 more weeks. That was very hard on me.. emotionally. It's the first major thing that has happened to a person I cared about. And as some of you know that is my biggest fear.. losing someone that I really care about. but I'm on the mend with that too. She is doing well, although getting a little tierd of us pampering her. Lol.. Unfortunatly (sp?) That wasn't the last of car accidents we were going to have to deal with. Megan Hall, A good friend of one of my best friends Nicole Barnes, died in a car accident about a week and a half ago. Nicole has taken it very hard! I havn't gotten to talk to her but once since Megan's accident..  and she was very numb.. and wouldn't hardly say anything. I've tried talking to her since then but she won't. I've tried calling her but she never picks up or calls me back. I'm really worried about her. She won't come to church at all... She doesn't seem to want to be around anyone.. I can kinda understand how she feels.. No I've never lost anyone.. but I've been afraid of that several times.. It makes me not want to be around anyone, for fear I'll get close to them and then something would happen and I would lose that person.It's a scary thing.. sometimes it feels like it's better just to seperate yourselves from other people.. it's a selfish way to live.. but sometimes it's all you know how to do.. so I'm really worried about her.. :( But there is other things that are going on with the youth group. LOTS! This saturday we are having a fundraiser to raise money for the mission trip we are plannin on taking this upcoming March. It should be alot of fun. Some of the older men in my church 25-40 are versing some of the women in a basketball game. And some of us teenage girls are putting on a half time show.. being cheerleaders of course :) lol.. yeah.. I'm going to be a cheerleader.. lol.. funny stuff. We are even wearing the skirts and tops and stuff of the old CC cheer uniforms. :) lol We have worked really hard over the past couple of weeks and it has paid off.. we have a good half time show ready to be performed :) Anyone who wants to come can! It's at the Cave City gym Saturday the 28th at 6:30pm.. The addmision is donations so give what you can for a really good cause. and then enjoy the show! Besides the mission trip we are going to Youth Celebration on Feb. 4th. It's an awesome convention! All centered around purity.. it's going to be amazing as usual. Full of Days is doing the music again :) And that means we get to see Matt and Missy :D YAY! AYC is in April as usual but I don't think I'm going this year because I'm afraid I won't be able to get off work.. we'll just have to see after we get back from the Mission Trip *I've already asked off for that so I'm deff. going!!* Eric and Bethany are dating now.. and have been for about a month I believe.. maybe a little longer.. they are so in love sometimes it makes me sick at my stomach.. lol.. I'm so happy for them! Jessica and Jamie are still dating.. I think it's been a little over a year for them :) And they still love each other very much :) I'm happy for them too! Holly and Brandon are dating even though they live apart from each other... they are soo sweet together! :) We call the the  Abercrombie and Fitch couple because of how perfect they are together :) hehe.. Paige is dating a guy from Rison named Mac.. they seem to be really happy too. I wish I could meet him.. Jessica is the only one of us that has gotten too because he and paige went to jess' house after mac picked paige up to go spend some time in his family's yacht :) lol.. yeah aparently this guy had money! lol.. hehe.. we're like paige when you get married show some love to us :D hehe Well enough about relationships.. I'm happy for all my friends.. but for now I can honestly say that I'm content being single. :) And that's really saying something for me. I've driffted from some of my friends but I've grown closer to some of my friends too :) I've gotten closer to Eric now that he is dating Bethany.. he's alot happier too now and that helps :) hehe.. And Jonas's is amazing! I've always loved him but our friendship has just gotten better in the last few months than it ever was before. And Jessica Allen is amazing I'm so glad that she started coming to our group! She really adds alot! I know that I can go and talk to her about anything! :) We have gotten alot of new members lately.. Like a bunch!! And that means more teens in our group! It's awesome! We are building a new sanctuary that's like going to massive! It will seat 900 people.. 700 on the ground floor and 200 in the balcony. It's going to be amazing!! And we'll have a new youth center! That's rocking awesome of course! All-in-All things are going really well in Crosswalk!

WORK:  
I am now working at Clydes Chuck Wagon right outside of Ash Flat. I really like it! Although the owner's daughter.. which happens to be my boss.. is REALLY hard to work with.. but I'm learning. It helps me to just brush off other people that yell at me.. Nothing get's through the wall I've built around my heart.. hardly anyone can get through.. but words can't either! I make really good money! I usually make around 8-10 dollars a hour including tips. It helps pay my cell phone and gas and things like that.. and I like to go and eat with the guys after we do things to so that means I have money for that.. along with some to put in savings for the day I leave the house :D HEHE I CAN'T WAIT TILL THAT DAY! :D:D IT pretty much takes care of anything I want :) And for that I'm greatful!

FAMILY:
Well things with the family are about the same.. and little better than usual I guess.. I think mom and dad finally realized that they weren't helping me by keeping me tied here. So I'm alowed to do alot.. I'm content with my social life as of right now :) And that's really saying something. Of course I've changed too.. I can get by being on my own a lot better now then I used to could. I realize that you can't depend on people to make you happy.. Sometimes you have to do that yourslef! But I'll talk more about me and what I like later on. As most of you know... our shop burnt down a couple of weeks ago.. that was a scary time! It took the firemen about 4 hours to get it under control. But they did a good job.. and kept it from spreading to our house or the dog kennel. The family is doing okay I guess.. Olivia (now 7 1/2) is in to everything.. She really likes school so she and mom do that whenever they can. Dakota (almost 15) is about the same.. he likes playing basketball and doing things with the group but he's still kinda shy and doesn't make much of an efort to get really envoled. And girls.. well he isn't quite there yet.. lol.. he doesn't really care about them to much  :) hehe.. mom and dad like that I think.. Unlike me.. lol. I think he should already be liking girls ;) Garrett is the same as always.. annoying lol.. he still likes to play with his toys all the time.. I think he should grow up and that mom and dad should make him.. but they always say.. it's just the way he is.. that may be true but only because they let him be that way.. he won't get far in life if he doesn't grow up soon! Mom is always busy with the kennel and taking care of the rest of the kids.. I'm really not around much between work, church, and school. I have more meals at othere places than I do at home. lol.. Dad is the same too.. always trying to get his fortune thing to work.. It makes me mad.. I dont' know why he can't go out and get a real job.. but of course he never listens to me.. we hardly speak to each other and it's best that way. Everytime we do it usually ends up in a fight. Bigmomma and Pops are coming down this weekend.. that should be good.. I havn't seen them since Christmas. Of course that wasn't that long ago.. just about a month.. but it's always good to see them. I wish I could go back with them and stay at their house for awhile like I did before.. but I have a job now.. and I can't just take off like that. Aunt Nancy and Uncle Van *not any relation just really good friends of the family* Are going to build a new house on a farm a few miles behind our house. And since uncle van's job takes him away for months at a time.. they want me to live in the house while they're gone :) I think that would be amazing! But depending on how long it takes them to get the house built I'll probably be gone before I'd have a chance to do that. I'm deff. not staying here any longer than I have too. I can't wait to get out on my own :) Just the idea of it excites me. But anyway.. that's about all there is with the FAMILY section :) hehe

ME:
Okay.. here's the section about me.. how I'm feeling.. what I like to do.. stuff like that :) Lol.. like I said I've changed alot! I really dont' know where to begin .. um.. let me think.. I know have almost blonde hair.. lol.. I just got it highlighted this last Saturday. I really like it.. although it's really different! I also got it cut a little too.. not too much.. but a little. People say it makes me look older.. and for that I'm grateful.. lol.. I never looked my age.. lol :) But I am getting there. I spend most of my free time reading.. I love my books.. it's like a higher power :) My escape from the real world that seems to close in around me. Since I got my radio fixed on my car it's always set for 107.9 the greatest country station on all time :D lol.. I love the country music.. although my family doesn't like it at all.. well my mom. dad, and garrett anyway. Dakota says it's okay.. but they're hardly with me so I listen to it all the time.. like one of the songs says.. It's songs about me! I love them!! Now that's probably going to make some of you raise an eyebrow.. go ahead :) You like some types of music I like a different kind.. just because it's different doesn't mean it's wrong :) So listen to what you like and I won't say anything about it.. try to do the same with me.. like I said I'm different now :) I eat alot now.. lol.. I'm not saying I'm fat by any means.. because I know I'm not * not to brag or anything.. just to assure some people* But I have gained back the weight I lost a couple summers ago :) And I'm in no way anorexic anymore..lol.. Thanks to two amazing guys on a trip and one amazing guy here giving me support I was able to stop :) And now the steaks at work help me stay that way :D hehe But yeah.. that's about it :)

Okay there's my post. Hope you enjoyed it.. I know it's long.. but I thought I needed to make up for lost time ;) LoL.. comment please!

-Heather/Heathen-

Hey People.. My first life is going good right now :) * Note to people... First life is things outside of my homeschool life a.K.a (Second Life)* Like things are pretty dang good actually. For those people who don't know already.. I am now officially a student at UACCB  I'll start classes this upcoming semester. I'm pretty excited about it.. Hopefully I'll meet some nice people.. I'm also hoping to find a few nice guys to hang with... But I guess I'll just have to wait and see what happens.. My ID photo is absolutly HORRIBLE! I mean like Major! Swear.. it's the worst thing I've ever seen. And then I have this like little sticker thing that I have to keep on my car.. lol.. anyway.. Work's okay. . Church is better.. um.. I still stay my normal sick thing.. but on top of that I'm like *really* sick.. and I have to work tomorrow... and my voice keeps going... and I really need my voice at work.. so idk.. anyway.. yeah..

Second Life : It's boreing.. like I really don't have any thing to do with the homeschool "group" anymore.. so like.. I really don't know what's all going on.. I mean I go pick Ben up for english sometimes.. but that's about it. But that's the way I want it so.. yeah.. anyway.. that's about it.. still love to get more comments..  Peace Out Peeps!